It's pigeons this time!

This morning, (early, since you ask) outside the boot room door I could here that ruddy blackbird winding himself up to a crescendo. "Ooooooooooooh its a dog! Ooooooooooh its a dog! Dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, cat, cat, cat, cat,cat,cat,cat etc".

Why he changed to a cat I shall never know as there aren't any cats around here and if they were I feel they would have been doing the right thing and been in bed asleep. Which to be frank is where I wish I was at that time. I had got the first bit right, I was in bed and I had got the second bit right as well until he started his infernal row on the roof above me. Suddenly, he took of across the manor gardens and all was quiet again for a moment until two Hercules from Lyneham masquerading as pigeons flew across and landed on the roof of the boot room and started gossiping among themselves. "Do you wanna know who, who, who?", asked the first. "I'd love to know who, who, who.", replied the other one. "I'll tell you who, who, who!" said the first. "Who, who, who?", urged the second. Now, please don't misunderstand me, I love a bit of gossip as much as the next dog. But these two useless bits of raptor bait never got to the point and said who had done what. A quick woof disturbed them and they flapped off to go and annoy someone else with their pointless gossip. On reflection the woof was not the best way of getting my point across and achieving enough peace to return to my slumber. I was just drifting off again when I heard The Owner come grumbling down the stairs and then evict me from my bed to go up the garden whilst he puts the kettle on. "I was sound asleep when I dreamt I heard you bark Jack!" he said as he put my breakfast in my dish. There then followed much breadmaking activity in the kitchen accompanied by singing and stuff but he is clearly getting much better at it as this time there was no scary sights with him covered in flour. However, much worse was to follow, it's very fast noisy car season again! To my understanding they still finished up back where they started! I think they must all have been using one of those useless Satnav things that The Owner threw out of the car window in a fit of pique last year after driving round and round Swindon town centre and not getting anywhere other than back where he started from!