Cat in the Pond

Sometimes you just notice things which you realise you should have known all along and yesterday was one of those days. I realised that cats don't float! I also realised that although when I, a K9, get wet through, it reveals my muscular figure as my wet coat clings to my rippling shoulders and thighs, a cat just looks kinda ridiculous.

Yesterday The Owner took me to see Owners Dad which happens altogether too infrequently. I say this not out of any necessary affection but because whenever I have gone there, Owners Dads Cat has offered me rich pickings from the remnants of barbecues or biscuits when he has overreacted to my appearance. So on this occasion, a barbecue not being one of the things on offer, I opted to lay in the conservatory nearest to a plate full of digestives which The Owner was devouring with great delight and frankly, to the exclusion of Owners Dad, despite his protests on the matter. Owners Dads Cat, who I shall refer to here as just Cat, left our little ensemble and went up the garden and laid in the sun under a funny little red tree beside the pond. In one of the neighbouring gardens Blackbird (and I don't think it is the same one as we have in the cottage garden as he spoke with a different accent) was venting forth on the presence of both a cat and a dog. "Dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, cat, cat, cat,cat,cat,catcatcatcat!" he shouted at the world as he took off from his perch on some apparent suicide mission over the top of the fence and swooped low over the pond and straight past Cat. Cat decided it would be good to vary his diet from the usual frogs and slow worms together with "on demand" dried food and include a little blackbird. So he lept forth from under the tree with claws drawn and missed Blackbird completely and it was at this point that Cat realised the flaw in his plan. He was three feet in the air, over the pond, and with no visible or practical means of support. I also have now realised that cats generally can make some very strange noises! Unlike myself when I get unexpectedly wet, I leap energetically from the pond to try and give the impression that I meant to do it, Cat just looks like The Owner trying to get out of the bath after using too much bath oil. I am sorry to admit that I am beginning to understand the pleasure in laughing at other animals misfortune and can see why The Owner seems to enjoy it so much.