The Builder Hoomun on a Wet Day

You may have noticed that it was raining yesterday. I know this to be true because when I came in from my first early morning patrol (which is little more than a dash up the garden to relieve the pressure slightly before demanding my breakfast) The Owner was particularly anxious that I didn't get too close to his short fat hairy legs.

I feel it my duty to rise to such a challenge and managed to rub a lot of the rain drops on my coat against his legs. That which I couldn't get onto him I stood brhind him and shook off, half of it went up his back, to shrieks of delight, and the remainder went up the door and wall. I have such simple pleasures in life! I am not digressing yet as the rain is important to my story. It was a wet day in Compton Bassett and I was settling down under the desk having chosen to defer my morning patrol, hopeful of a morning snoozing in the warm and dry, when the door burst open! Well, I say burst, but in reality it is becoming more of a fight with a sticking door which the uninitiated can easily lose. I suspect what followed was something to do with Manor Hoomun (The Owner's landlord) losing just such a fight with the door the previous day. There followed much drama from Manor Hoomun and a long sit down in the comfy seat and a very large measure of The Owners brandy he got from the airport on his trip abroad recently. This was followed by much telephone action and the arrival yesterday morning of Builder Hoomun. The one who did the work down at the cottage last year. The door was wide open and lots of banging and scraping as sawdust and rain covered everything including me! Well he was working away near my biscuit bucket, which also got covered in sawdust, so I tried very hard with my little 'give me a biscuit' dance. To no avail! So I tried a bit harder. Still to no avail! Then he shouted something like "Geroutofitheway Mutt". I have no idea what it meant but I gather from his general demeanor that I wasn't popular with him. So he chased me out of MY office! I didn't think that was a good thing to do so I ran around the back of his van and wee'd in his tool bag and then went up into the calf sheds out of the way. A quick sniff round unearthed something rather unpleasant and very organic which even I would not have rolled in so I took that down and left that for Builder Hoomun in the back of his van. I feel a point was made!