On Fly Papers

Oh man, I am in a right pickle here! It all started innocently enough; we have a bit of a problem here at the moment with flies. Now believe me when I say they are a pain! They can even bite through my fur, and through The Owner's trousers which I think indicates either a very brave or very stupid fly. They have become such a nuisance desperate measures were called for.

The Owner rummaged around in one of his draws for at least an hour, (well it seemed like it at the time alright?) and produced, finally, a rolled up fly paper. Well I think he should have pinned it up first and then unrolled it, but would he listen to me? Oh no! It first got stuck to the hairs on his arm and in trying to remove it from there he got it stuck to his shirt. Pulling it off that it got stuck to his right hand. Teasing it from his right hand his leg became stuck to it and then it all fell down again together with The Owner. Removing it from his hand by standing on it meant it was stuck to his foot and he walked around for a while like that lady at the pub with the loo roll the other day. Eventually he got it removed from every part of his anatomy that it had tried to attach itself to and re-attached to the ceiling above his desk. To start with the flies had clearly not been told how to use one properly as in the first three hours not a single fly had landed on it and just to rub salt into his wounds I saw six flies copulating on the desk. Now this morning I was busy at the keyboard myself entering up my blog and stuff when the damn thing came down again. All over me, as you ask! I now have glue all over the keyboard and it looks something like the carpet in the mornings after the slug that no one can find has been wandering around the office all night. There is a vast amount of fly glue all over me as well, my paws and claws are covered as well and to cap it all the fly paper was still empty but they are landing all over my back and sticking!!