The Monster from the Depths of The Pond

This evening I am at something of a loss to understand The Owners behaviour. Although I do understand what he did is normal hoomun behaviour for so many. However I am not too sure about the damp patch that he is leaving everywhere he sits and I would just like to point out that I was in no way responsible for these damp patches. The observant among you will have noticed that yesterday was a little.... well..... inclement I think about sums it up. This inclementness (and the spell check doesn't like that word but it seems like it ought to be a word to me in these circumstances) deposited a great deal of water in the pond. In fact it was right up to the road again when we came home this evening. It was also getting very gusty and these gusts were having a profound affect upon my bottom. Gusts of wind upon a K9 bottom are not to recommended when it is this cold. So anyway, The Owner approached the side of the pond where the water comes up to the wall and is about three feet deep and as most hoomuns seem to do, he had to walk right up to the edge. That was where his day took a turn for the worse. There was a gust of wind approaching at a great rate and it was a very strong gust which was a little more than I could realistically enjoy when it set about my bottom and tail. However, as the gust passed I turned to see whether The Owner had finished with his activities standing on the side of the pond, except he wasn't there!! He was gone!!! It was then that a monster emerged from the depths of the pond which immediately started grumbling... loudly. It was clearly The Owner! I am guessing that he didn't enjoy the attentions of the gust of wind upon his bottom either. To be honest wind and his bottom are frequently uttered in the same sentence. Although why he felt it necessary to throw himself in the pond in that manner I am at a loss to explain. If The Owner has got cold and wet and can find no one to blame for his predicament it is going to be a dangerous place to be around here this evening so I may go and find my duvet early. Just in case.