My Parcel from Bonio Hoomuns

Today I am officially beside myself! I know this because I heard The Owner tell someone on the phone that "Jack is beside himself today". Now I have pondered this for quite a while this morning when I should really have been doing other things. I have studied it from many different angles. I have laid down, I have curled up, I have laid on my back with my legs in the air. I have even run very fast round and round a few times, but I cannot work out what is involved in being "beside myself" and how I must have inadvertently got into such a predicament without even knowing I had done it! Now, important news of the day, about which I am very excited. I have had a parcel delivered today by Postman. My snifter didn't let me down when I deduced that there was more than just the usual assortment of envelopes that seem to irk The Owner so much in the heap that he carried up the pathway, so I thought it prudent not to fire up the big guns on this occasion. Then Postman presented me with a big red parcel with a picture of a Bonio on it!!! The envelope was addressed to Jack Labrador Esquire. I am not yet sure whether I am an Esquire or even what it involves to be one, but if there is a Bonio involved then I can be soooooo many things. Well, when I managed to rip it out of Postman's hands and then rip the covers off in a Bonio fuelled unpacking frenzy I discovered inside not one but ten boxes of Bonios from the nice hoomuns at Bonio!!! I am so excited! Well at least I was until The Owner whipped them all off me and gave me just the one Bonio back. I think he walks like a camel, he smells like one too! Now, I think I am going to have a little snooze whilst I work out how I managed to get beside myself. Are there two of me perhaps?